In 2018, I resigned from my job.

Not because I wasn’t enjoying it anymore.

But because I felt it was time.

Time to go deeper.
To make space for what truly matters.

I’ve been meditating since 2003, and over the years, I’ve done many 10-day retreats with different teachers.

But somehow — deep inside — I knew it was time for something else.
Deeper. Still(er).

Also, because life is temporary.
And we shouldn’t keep postponing what’s essential.

So I left. To Mexico. For a 59-day solo silent retreat.

No phone. No books. No people.

Just silence.
And the restlessness within myself.

And somewhere there — in that emptiness — something happened.

A kind of coming home.
As if I no longer needed to search.

There was only presence.
Clarity. Peace.

After those two months of silence, I took time to integrate.

I stayed in Mexico a bit longer to let everything settle.
And shortly after — still in 2018 — I went to Guatemala.

For another silent retreat, this time guided. Thirty days.

The teacher there read aloud from a book:
Bönpo Dzogchen Teachings – according to Lopön Tenzin Namdak.

And I thought: wait a minute…
This is what I experienced in Mexico.

That natural state. Still. Open. Intimate with everything.

Back in the Netherlands, I immediately bought the book.

On the cover: an old Tibetan master — Lopön Tenzin Namdak Rinpoche.

I googled his name — and to my surprise…
He was still alive. And teaching. In France. At 93 years old.

A few weeks later, I was sitting next to him in the grass.
Literally. No stage. No distance. Just a master among people.

That moment changed my life.
He became my teacher.

Fortunately, I was in Kathmandu for his in February 2025 to see him one last time for his 100th birthday.
He passed away on June 12, 2025.

100 years old.
After his passing, he remained in Tukdam for eight days —
the deep meditative state of realised masters.

🌱

I’m not sharing this story out of nostalgia.
But because I believe that what I experienced there —
that silence, that clarity —
also lives within you.

And you don’t need to go to Mexico to find it.